Deserter: New Life-Chapter Two-Regrets [Eleven Years Earlier]

“Get outta my way.”

Rain twisted her neck to see who was behind her. Clark Dran, her mom’s newest boyfriend. Rain sneered at him. “Fuck off, asshole.”

Stars flashed in front of her eyes as Clark slammed his fist into her cheek, just below her left eye, feelings of hate and satisfaction flowing off him. Rain toppled to the floor to land on her knees and shook the dizziness out of her head. Although she was easy to pass now that she was down, Clark stood over her, gloating. Rain shook her head again and shoved herself up to her feet to stare at him. Her face throbbed and she knew a black eye would follow this encounter, if not anything worse. Rage clouded Clark’s features and Rain wondered if getting up had been a mistake. This time the blow was a backfist and it connected with Rain’s temple, causing her to drop unconscious to the ground. Clark kicked her in the ribs with his steel toed boot before passing, leaving her on the den carpet.

When Rain woke up she was still on the carpet and all the lights were out. It had been late when she’d had her run in with Clark already, so she figured it was somewhere around five in the morning now. She shoved her hair from her face and stood upright, slowly. Her head spun dizzily and she dropped back to her knees to crawl to the sofa.

Rain sat on the sofa for forty-five minutes before she felt she could stand without collapsing, and then she made her way to the bathroom. Staring at her reflection told her what she already knew. Her left eye was almost swollen completely shut and from the strike to the temple there was an almost black bruise decorating the right side of her face. Another wave of dizziness reduced her to clutching desperately at the bathroom counter to stay upright, but it passed quickly and she stumbled half-hazardly into the kitchen, finding a bottle of aspirin on the counter. Aspirin was a staple in her household, where Mommy Dearest and Boyfriend Clark woke up with hangovers almost every morning.

A bottle of whiskey sat on the counter next to the aspirin, an oxymoron, and Rain popped two then washed it down with a swig of the throat burning whiskey. She grimaced as it burned a path to her stomach then wiped her mouth with the back of her sleeve. She’d once heard somewhere that chasing aspirin with liquor could kill you. Rain took another swig then headed for her room.

She flicked on the light and walked over to her makeshift desk. There it sat. Two weeks of searching for the right material for it, then another two weeks of shaping it, balancing it, testing it. All that preceded by fifteen years of waiting for it to end, for getting the resolve and courage to end it herself. Rain reached out and grabbed her shiv, her pride, her answer. The dizziness was gone, her stomach warmed by the whiskey and her determination to end it was in full force, doubled by her encounter with Clark and his fist earlier.

Curses and irritation flooded her senses as she kicked open her mom’s bedroom door and flipped on the lights. Knowing that she could take her mom out easy, Rain leapt at Clark first, shiv ready for the kill. He was just swinging his legs over the edge of the bed when she stepped in front of him.

His lips curled in disgust and just as he was lifting his hand to strike her, Rain lashed out. A howl of rage pulled from her throat and she felt her sanity slipping as blood sprayed from Clark’s torn throat. The shiv was extremely sharp and sliced across it easy and deep. It spattered across her face and throat and now her mom was screaming.

“Shut up, Kay,” Rain ordered her screaming mother. She never called her Mom or anything to that accord. She used her mom’s first name; her mom had never been motherly to her anyway.

With a calm coolness, Rain circled the bed and grabbed a handful of Kay’s hair, pulling her head back to expose her throat. Kay pleaded with her daughter, who’s eyes shown a crazed determination. Rain pulled her lips back from her teeth and raked Kay’s throat with the blade and then dropped her head to the bed.

Then she left, grabbing a bag stuffed with one extra change of clothes and some travel food she’d bought before. Jerky, bottled water, canned beans. A few other necessities and Rain was gone, leaving her mother and her old life behind to find her own way.

~~~

Back To Present

*

Sam awakened four hours later, stiff from sleeping upright in a vinyl covered chair. He popped his neck and back deftly then stood to examine Rain. The monitor said she was still alive and that her pulse and respiration had gotten stronger and more regular. He breathed a sigh of relief.

Despite her pale skin and the frightening stillness, Sam was sure Rain would live now. The timer said she’d be out in another two hours and that meant Sam could sleep another hour then eat and shower before Rain was capable of doing the same.

Two hours later, feeling little better despite being clean and fed, Sam entered the room where Rain was under glass, so to speak. When he stepped up to her mend chamber Rain’s eyes fluttered open and she eyed him calmly.

The glass distorted Sam’s features to Rain, but she knew it was him. She’d been in a similar situation not so long ago, on a space ship with another man. This one intrigued her as well.

Sam waved at Rain through the glass and she felt her lips twitch in mild response. She watched him move to the control board and punch in a few commands and then the glass slid away from her. She didn’t attempt to move. Rain had never allowed herself to be put in one of these things, no matter what. She didn’t trust them, but it seems this one had saved her life. Rain had been sure her life was over when the lights had gone out.

Maybe this was the real second chance she’d wanted. Not the one she’d made for herself back when she’d taken out Kay and Clark. But this, a near death experience, and waking up to a kind face.

“Can you sit up?” Sam asked her cautiously.

Rain closed her eyes for a moment then opened them again. Sam cloaked his feelings as well. One of those people that didn’t open themselves up easily. “I don’t know,” she managed. Her throat felt closed and her stomach and back were still sore.

“C’mon, I’ll give you a hand,” he answered and slid a hand behind her shoulder and beneath her knees then lifted her against his chest. Rain wrapped an arm around his neck and laid against his broad chest. It felt good to be taken care of.

Sam carried her down a hallway, then another. The complex was bigger than Rain had though, but they finally arrived a door that Sam opened with a pass card. He had to lower her to the ground to do it, and Rain leaned against his side weakly as he slid the key threw the lock and the door clicked. He scooped her back up and carried her inside.

The room wasn’t furnished like the rest of the hospital. It was a suite of rooms. Rain lifted her head curiously and looked around. “Is this where you live?” she asked.

“No. This is one of the rooms rich patrons of the hospital get to stay. But since I think you’re sexy, you can stay here instead of one of the regular patience rooms.”

Rain eyed him incredulously and found him grinning down at her. He’d been teasing her. She couldn’t remember ever being teased before. Not playfully, like this. She smiled back and he carried her to a room with a bed.

Sam laid her on the bedspread carefully and sat next to her. There’s a bathroom through there,” he pointed to a door slightly ajar, “and if you want anything to eat, just ask. It’s going to take a while before you’re back up to par. The mend chamber isn’t really for serious injuries like that unless it’s a serious emergency. I thought it was, so I tossed you in. Looks like it worked.

“You can take another sleep in there tomorrow if you’re still sore. Right now you need food and rest.”

Rain forced her sluggish body upright and looked Sam in the eye. “I’ve been sleeping for hours. How long was I out?”

Sam shrugged. “Six hours or so. I thought you weren’t going to make it. You lost a lot of blood.”

Rain nodded. “Yeah, I figured. What happened? Why didn’t the Ranger drag me off?”

“I didn’t leave when you told me to. I came out to give you your gun back when that guy showed up. When you got shot he was dragging you away and I made him let you go and brought you back here.” He eyed her curiously. “I still don’t know why I did it.”

Rain squeezed her eyes shut, but when she opened them they were full of pain. “Why the hell did you bother with me? You should of saved Brand and Ven. They were looking for their sister, they would have lived! I’m not worth anything!”

Sam was startled. “You’d sacrifice yourself for them? I saved your life, and you’d give it up to have me have saved them instead?”

“Damn it, yes! Brand’s a kid. Now they’ll rot in prison.”

“Why do you think that?”

“Because they’re two of the Wolfs. There was Drake and Reese Wolf first and they had three kids. When The Company went after them, Gynce, Ven, and Brand Wolf disappeared and didn’t resurface for years. Then Gyn Wolf came out again, and took out a large number of Rangers. When she got locked up her little brother and sister took over the family legacy.

“That family alone has killed close to one hundred Rangers and other Company operatives. Maybe more.”

“Christ, I had no idea who they were. That would explain the tattoo on Ven’s shoulder. The wolf.” Sam shook his head. “You said they had a sister. What happened to her?”

“She got thrown in Ursa Lunar for life. Slam City is unforgiving, but she escaped somehow. Last I heard of her, her ship had crashed and she’d died when it burned up on some backwater planet. I have to go after them!” Rain rolled off the bed and tried to stagger out of the room but her knees buckled and she fell to the floor.

Sam leapt over and lifted her again. She was sobbing. “You don’t understand! They cared about me. Don’t you get it? No one’s ever cared about me, I’m not going to let them down! Lemme go!”

Rain fought Sam with all she had left in her and he sat back on the bed, holding her on his lap against his chest, his arms locked around her slim frame. She finally couldn’t fight anymore and collapsed against him, sobbing silently. “Why didn’t you save them? I’m not worth it. I’m not worth anything... Why didn’t you save them?”

She murmured those words over and over again until she finally fell asleep against his chest and Sam held her close to him. He didn’t know why’d he’d saved her. He just had. Something had told him to do it, that she would be worth it.

She was already worth something to him.

***

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